Lost (Succumbed)

To Cute Girls
And
Wrong Thoughts
Plus
The Probability
Of
Pursuing Happiness.

The Journey to Pocketing the iPhone 6

So I finally got my own hands on an iPhone 6.

It is my first iPhone. I have officially lost my iPhone virginity. This is when you go, "Ooh~ ahh~ dayummm girlllll~~~~" in your head or out loud to your laptop screen--whatever works, really. Yet the extreme satisfaction of owning this gadget that is so, so, so, so, so, so, so, very fucking much coveted by like so many people around the world... isn't really present with me. What's the shorter way of putting it? Umm.

#Disappointment. 

a) I just blew almost a grand on a goddamn calling device.

b) And that grand is totally hard frickin' sweat, man. I worked my glands off mopping floors, making really bad coffee, and selling it for a ridiculous amount of price to brainwashed consumers at Starbucks.

c) I don't even know whether it really was the iPhone's existence that made me purchase it or whether it was the constant iPhone-related articles that were popping up on the internet left, right, and center.

d) I think I was brainwashed to buy it.

e) Then the iCloud hack happened and it was just like MY INTERNET = APPLE NEWS.

f) Unfortunately, this MY INTERNET = APPLE NEWS still continues. Can people just STOP POSTING ANYTHING RELATED TO "BENDING."

g) People should also stop "wittily" mentioning the "bend" thing to me, too. It's so old. There must be another #EpicMegaUltimateDesignFail worth writing a Mashable "velocity report" article on. (Maybe not, actually).

h) The quality of content on Mashable is laughable (I rhymed)! Is Mashable now a personal Apple-PR-runner? Apple-channel? Apple-website? Apple-speaker? Apple-funnel? Apple-core???? I really need to unsubscribe from them. They are driving me nuts.

i) I stalked Apple Canada's RESERVE AND PICK UP site day and night to no avail.

j) I just buried myself in self-created sadness because I was so ritually refreshing iPhone Reservation website with tiny hopes of seeing an "Unavailable" turn into "Available." Funny how the Albertan locations would always have like one model available. #TheOnlyTimeIWishIWereLivingInAlberta #VancouverSnobiety

k) Then the AVAILABLE happened! And being a jittery fool, I made the wrong finger movement of reserving the SPACE GREY instead of Gold... I tried to reserve again, but I'm only allowed one reservation per day and of course everything is AUTOMATED and nobody wants to help me/has access to actually switching my precious once-per-day reservation...

l) I LITERALLY CRIED on my bed. I was so burnt out of clicking refresh per every 20 minutes for more than a week for this super expensive phone that just had me wanting it without any logical reasoning... Except that it's an iPhone 6? All sorts of angst and frustration that were previously unknown to me surged inside out.

m) I gave up on everything and cleared my mind. Through mindfulness over attending university classes, I went over to Pacific Center to pick up my iPhone 6 in 16 gb (non-optimal storage size) in space grey (nobody wants this colour, right?) and paid everything in full in cash.

n) I just kept thinking that I really need to learn the Craigslist know-how's to purchasing electronics.

And this is how my journey to pocketing the iPhone 6 started and ended.

******************************

I'm actually an Apple fan, but their technology's functionality rating plus the designs are failing my expectations here and there.

For sure, the iPhone 6 is the best phone I've owned, but it has too many aspects that could be improved. This room for improvement outshines and outweighs all of its "value-adding and innovative" features. Like, yeah, the camera's better. Well, iPhone had such shit camera specs anyways, it's the easiest thing you could improve to meet the industry standard -- set by Samsung. How about focusing on actually shaving down on the camera's jutting out part instead of just photoshopping it in all images used on websites and campaigns? I can only just laugh out loud with pangs of sadness.

It really is true; the world needs Steve Jobs but he is no longer here. Post-Jobs-Apple is no longer the Apple I fawned over and grew up with. It has almost become a laughing figure of a stalemate. No wonder they split their shares, Jony Ives is doing interviews, Tim Cook is made fun of in the most blatant ways, and iOS8 had bugs that limited your phone to an iPod. 

This post turned out to become an emotional rant on Apple, but actually I was aiming to outline Apple's power as a trusted brand with a scary fanatic cult following. For Apple, the product quality does not even matter, the apps that are exclusively offered on the iOS (e.g. VSCO Cam) drive their cult following. The above-you / above-Microsoft / above-all stigma that Jobs had created before he left is still prevalent amongst the consumer groups and drives sales numbers. Any kind of negative feedback or negative social marketing remarks against Apple actually works FOR them, transforming into more earned media for them. As you can see from my previous steps within buying my iPhone 6, the number of Apple-related news from the internet (whether the sentiments were positive or negative) affected my decision to purchase the phone. The more talked about this product or brand is, the more it stays within your mind. 

Tjaco Walvis says that purchasing decisions are made subconsciously even before the consumer goes through the analysis of their consideration set brands/products. I can definitely concur with this. Even before I weighed out my pros and cons of buying the iPhone and while I was shuffling through all sorts of iPhone 6 related articles, updates, news, comments, and status updates, I was already more than 100% sure that no matter the end utility gained, I will purchase this HOT HOT HOT GADGET. 

Funny how much easier it is for me to admit that I have fallen into a victim of clever, 360-degree consumer touchpoint marketing trap, now that I am in this industry. I love what I do because I know it works on me--rather beautifully.

******************************

P.S. Because I don't want to sound like a miserable and spoiled capitalistic consumer, my actual desperation for owning this new phone ASAP stemmed from the fact that I was currently using a Samsung Galaxy S2 (circa 2011). I think this is the single valid reason I can state.

URGENT: finding more friends on the app, Yo

Source: businessinsider.com

About two weeks ago, Yo launched with vigor. 

It accumulated a ton of curiosity as its sole purpose is to send yo's to friends. What does that even mean? It means I tap on your name on the screen and it sends a push notification saying that I just yo'd you. Sometimes (and I still haven't figured out why it's only sometimes) the phone says "yo" out loud in this mechanical manly tone, "yo~" Listening to it "yo" is EXTREMELY satisfying and instantaneously makes your day 400 times better.

Plus, as if the app isn't a joke enough (parodies like the Game of Thrones Hodor-ing instead of Yo-ing has emerged), the reviews on the Apple app store page are hilarious!

The problem with Yo (as an app) right now is its decline in popularity. Just like how it had shot to the top of the app store, now it is just another app floating in the appsphere. There are talks about how Yo is a revolutionary app opening the doors into a new level of push notification strategies... but isn't this taking everything a little too far? Isn't this the model example of the North American way of flourishing everything with words for depth? Though we all know what is shallow and what is not, we are all prone to influences. When embellishments are smartly stated, they have the power to disorient the audience into believing in them. In all optimism and fast-paced world of technology, let's see how Yo turns itself around. Until then, I'm having a ton of fun Yo-ing three contacts. THREE. So sad. Therefore, I am searching for more friends on Yo.... add me @ rachelchungg and we can Yo all day...!!!!!!! 

On a side note, there's apparently this new social networking portal opening that is going to be strictly emoji-only. If you've IM-ed with me before, you know how critical emoticons are to my well-being and heightened level of communication. I've already reserved my Emoji.li username. Maybe you'd like to do so? Then we can be friends on the two of the world's "dumbest" + "minimalistic" apps.

Ciao, till later!
Yo!

Return

Today I return with some peace on my mind and with "chutzpah" around all the dull corners of my mentality and life. However insecure that may sound, I am the most confident about myself and my surrounding environment right now. I can't articulate how satisfied I am at the moment into words, because there seems to be absolutely no thin ice under me. Am I grounded? Is this growing up and knowing yourself? Or is this an alternate reality that grown-ups make for themselves so that they can call themselves grown up?

Let us end with the word games and believe in emotional intelligence.

source: iampurpose

I have had the most wonderful past few days filled with Netflix, friends, good coffee, drinks, IM messages, Snapchat, Korean food, company, never-ending assignments, and even some reading. The sun had graced the people of Vancouver to its almighty beauty and happiness for a few days before letting the rain fall to freshen up the city. The cherry blossoms are all dead on the sidewalk and make me feel good to be born human-can you believe being born as a cherry fucking blossom? Never. One will have a lifespan of at maximum one week, weather permitting. Ugh. But coming back on point, I'm basically laying the grounds on the good days I've had. Ergo, I'm blogging again. This summer, I have a feeling that I will take up on some personal challenges all revolving around the central theme of REGULARITY. Making some DAILY PATTERNS. Having a REGULAR lifestyle. Y'know like waking up at a certain time and keeping up with the blog, giving some love to the regular people, texting mommy a nice text at 2 pm when she's just chilling on Facebook, attempting to work out for 15 minutes... Stuff like that...

This was further enforced by myself unto myself after watching Bill Cunningham New York.

REFLECTION POINTS:
a) I need to go to NYC.
b) I need to be like this guy - I need to have one look, ride my bike, become really old, be a walking encyclopedia about one topic, do not give a fuck about money, and go to church every Sunday.

Whatever that Bill Cunningham has NEVER conveyed to the public gets communicated in this short documentary. Wonderfully edited with past and current clips, holistically respectful to Bill, and finally with great emphasis on NYC, the city itself, is amazing. It is only about 90 min long, which makes it just a nap-replacer. I cried a lot since Bill is going to go sometime soon and his absence will inevitably create a void.

Anyways, I have a long way to go until I can be a sophisticated lady, yet a New Yorker. So I guess I'll just keep tumbling around and grow some branches. From those arms, I'll fixate on a few things and lay down some roots. And then I will become a cherry blossom tree and flutter my life away within a week.

Hey man, that doesn't sound that bad. #CherryBlossomSuicidalNote #FictionorNot?

Sorry for being creepy. I'm just neurotic. That's all. Don't mind my words.

source: thetrustdoesnotexist

-- PEACE OUT -- VANCITY SUMMER 2014 -- STOKED --

Yesterday and Today

Life is not fair but it has been fair and good to me.
Slump has thoroughly ran me over and has moved on to another victim.

I stood up again.
Stronger than before, yet again.

I am home.
And soon I will embark.

Where I'm Going - Cut Copy

#Findingthemissinglover

Another Excerpt

BGM: L'Amour Stories by DEERHOOF

I had a dream – and it wasn’t about going somewhere. It was a dream about already being there; that “somewhere.”
I never saw myself, but I saw my hands and feet. They were connected to all the right limbs and I felt light weight; I was ready to fly!
Holding on to a heavy camel envelope, it was my portfolio of my pop-up stores – including a Candy Crush pop up store; now that one was brilliantly sleek with white curvy walls and large-size blow up candies with the special candies from the game being even larger! It was a large selection of print outs of all the ones I did and I was bringing it to the newly upgraded office of University of British Columbia’s to see the dean. Turns out, my uncle is the newly appointed head of I-don’t-even-know-what and there were all these kids in the lobby for a more “human” and “nice” effect apparently. Oh, so in this future, kids are merely accessories. Nice. I love this world.
And as soon as I opened the doors to the dean’s office, things spiraled out of control and I couldn’t handle the air pressure. I couldn’t breathe. The chaos continued and I saw my portfolio of pop-up stores and my coworkers’ faces fly into the air, the world flipped and gravity – what is gravity? French, German, and Russian lyrics floated in the air and I snapped my hands at them trying to get them away. They came at me in subtitles like a rope, trying to tie me down. Snap, slap, snap, slap.
Snap.
Slap.
Fuck.

With colleagues + photographer Kim Jungman during the Eyes of Vega exhibition at PLATOON. 

such personal k-times

Honestly speaking, there's not much happening in Seoul in my personal bubble, however, I don't know why I'm always out of time. I have a really different set of priorities in Seoul and I think it's deteriorating me bit by bit. But I'm growing.
And now, I am obviously not making any sense by contradicting myself.

Just look at some pics okay?

BGM: 서울은 흐림 (cloudy seoul) by 못 (Mot)

peace out

RAAAAAAANT

APPARENTLY A BLOG IS WHERE YOU RANT ABOUT EVERYTHING AND THEN HAVE EVERYONE READ IT AND THEN SECRETLY HATE YOU FOR RANTING SO MUCH.

Therefore

I don't want to rant.

I really want to wail.

But I will wait.

And whisper

in a small little voice

perchance husky as my mother calls it

in my morning voice

into your ear

with small

tears

by the corners of my eyes

"how come I'm here
I'm finally doing everything for myself
but I'm not myself"

breathe
weep

"and I'm doing everything else than whatever
I want to be doing for myself...
at this moment."

sigh
smile

"Lack of sleep, maybe," you may reply.

Prayin' hard

Tobias Wong

Meet Tobias "Tobi" Wong.

On Oct 4th, I was lucky enough to be invited by Nigel to attend an exhibition talk at the Museum of Vancouver. I was a naive little girl, having no idea who this internationally acclaimed artist, Tobias Wong, was, yet entering an intimate circle of his -- friends + family -- at the talk.

I have all sorts of mixed feelings about this night. So I think I will just point form my thoughts.

a) I didn't like how yuppy the crowd was. I didn't like myself for not being as open to talking with any of the people there. I thought that I was someone who really likes "art," including all the pretentious fuckeries and beautiful bullshit phrases that are involved with it. But it wasn't so. And I had many internal conflicts.

b) I thought his death was super interesting. I liked this guy, Tobi Wong, more due to his death. He was one helluva sleepwalker. He finished art pieces and cleaned his whole house while he sleep walked, and that is FASCINATING already, right!? But he had committed suicide while sleep walking. Now, that. That gives me the shivers.

The NY Times made a limited edition newspaper scented candle in honour of his death

c) He was an asshole artist. He created stuff with objects that already existed as his mediums. He gold-plated everything cheap and made it into a luxury while he destroyed everything luxurious to make it into cheeky art. I can't deal with that; it is unethical and immoral BUT IT'S SO GENIUS so I'm really jealous. Again, I'm conflicting with myself.

The Money Pad made out of one hundred $1 bills and sold for $199.

The $20 000 Warhol print wrapped around a box....

The gold plated things...

The ring series including the Killer Ring.

Nigel having fun with the silver plated light switch.

d) Needless to say though, his pieces are pretty cool. I liked how some of them were super TRENDY but you can tell that some are timeless art and they definitely deserve love and special care.

e) The thing that Nigel said which was BANG ON about the evening (and I am not a living voice recorder so I don't remember the word-for-word quote, but it was something along the lines of...): "It's almost like it is not enough to just like his art, but we have to like him, too. I've never been to such an event where they ask for us to like the GUY making the art as much as his work." Then we kept talking to come to a conclusion that the leading and famous artists of today must be liked in 360 degrees point of view. For example, we not only like their music, but they have to be talented, beautiful, a good dancer, and also a philanthropist. Go figure.


Intrigued?
Meet Tobias Wong through NY Times: The Mysteries of Tobias Wong
In the Georgia Strait: Object(ing): The Art/Design of Tobias Wong praises a true provocateur

tweet @rachelchungg tweet

D-3 til K-Town

Whaz on ma desktopz

1)  Dress in black. ALWAYS. Why do I even bother not dressing in black... MK in layers of black looking like a damn fine vampire. I need a bag by The Row. The second pic is from YSL's SS 13 show... your eyes hold no importance. Must cover them with a wide rimmed black hat. YESYES.

2) "Shave your eyebrows and creative colour the f*** out of your hair," says fashionistas from Japan!! Do NOT watch the bagel head/saline injection video... you'll puke yer guts out. :'( 

3) The world must not end in 2012, since his next movie is supposedly coming out in 2014: THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL. #MegaSwoonForever

4) .........       ^__^* 

Tweet @rachelchungg

Tumble @iampurpose

Between Oct 1st and 2nd

They had deep eyes, full of purity. Untouched by any sort of injustice in this world, they came to my doorstep (which was basically my room door) and knocked. They seemed so small due to their clear eyes that seemed to pop out at me that I instantly wanted to care for them.

"We're looking for work," said the boy.
He looked worn yet comfortable in ripped black skinny jeans and a white tee shirt. He had a full head of dark brown -- almost black -- curly locks. I just wanted to run my fingers through them to see how tangled the mess was; it also looked extra soft due to its oil. His right hand was in his jacket pocket and his left held the girl's hand. His eyes were dull showing no venom nor complexity.
She was a pretty little thing with soft white skin. Her lashes long and her bright blue eyes sparkling with hope and amazement. She channeled Pattie Boyd.. Maybe due to her soft, long blonde hair with bangs, of course. She just glowed everywhere! She was so delicate!!!! It wasn't believable that her hand wasn't crushed within her beau's. She was a teenage heartthrob, a vintage film star, the epitome of caucasian women, etc.......

They were the most beautiful couple I have ever seen.
They were the purest couple I have ever seen.
They were so in love that they brought tears to my eyes and made me nauseous.
I wanted them to be mine.

So I employed them by sticking them up on my wall with the double-sided Scotch tape. They were bigger than all the figurines that I had stuck up on the ceiling and the walls of my room, but they fit right in. When I lay on my bed, they were right above my body on the right wall. I stuck them up making sure that they were still holding hands. They were oh, so very happy, and were ridiculously good at staying up on the walls. They were polite, too. When I left the room, they said good-byes, and when I came back they always greeted me with a smile from each of them.

This did not seem bizarre at all. Except once, before closing my lids to go to bed, I glanced up at them and realized that... Maybe humans shouldn't be stuck up on walls even if this were a dream. Then I imagined a concept from 추격자, this Korean film, where the serial killer hung his victims' corpses, then slit their achilles heels to drain them from everything heavy the bodies have. My couple looked just like them all of a sudden. Am I supposed to slit their Achilles? Fucking disgusting.

So the very next day, in order to clear my mind perhaps, I decided to go shopping. I wanted to get some new clothes and underwear for the two of them. I went inside this store which had TONS of undies: fancy ones; cheap ones; skanky ones; and like, reaaaaaaally weird ones, too. So yeah. The store reeked of the vintage-store-dusty smell, and the lighting was pretty terrible. Pink and black feather boas hung from the ceiling and the employees all had some sorts of body modifications. The mirrors were all pieced together as if I was looking down a kaleidoscope and they were of NO HELP at all. I thought to myself, "where the fuck am I? The Palace of Versailles????" Idk what was going on in my head either.

I was getting dizzy and felt like puking so I left the store through its tiny back door to find my couple outside. Oh right, I guess I gave them a day off for the day....(!?) This is when I learn of their names, Matthew (Mattie) and Susan (Susie).
Susie was only wearing a 50s style white two piece and a neon snap back. I wasn't sure if it was a bikini or just a bra and panties. Matt was in a light blue suit... some kinda outfit which was totally put together by Saturday Night Live's costume designer. It was a horrendous suit, but because Matt is such a handsome fellow, it didn't really matter. He looked scrumptious.

The two were super happy to see me, and I couldn't believe how much their greeting made me happy. If they hadn't been as happy when talking to me or if they hadn't fawned all over me, showing off their new clothes, I think I might have even cried. Them seeing, greeting, and coming over to me meant a HUGE deal to me just then.
Anyhow, the two kept rattling on about how the store people were really nice even though they look scary. They had gotten their clothes from them for free.
I guess these two can be loved anywhere they go. Their beauty being ridiculously attractive, but it's because of their innocence and genuine naivety! They were not people of our time; where and when did these two come from?

They had drank a bit before meeting me with the store people. I looked over at the crowd. Kind of a strange bunch; their vibe was a mix of Die Antwoord and LMFAO... Yeah............

Susan had learned to longboard and wanted to show me. She abruptly grabbed the board from the alley and started off to ride on the roadside, not the sidewalk. I started to panic because the road was super busy for some reason. Cars were everywhere and I knew that something would go wrong. I screamed after her and grabbed a bike on the side to chase after her. It was then when I got hit by a bus and went flying off my bike. It was here when I lost track of time and space and Susie and only chaos ensued.

Only chaos ensued.

When I awoke, the road was still full of traffic. I was physically fine but paranoid. I kept walking down the road to find a small commotion of people in front of a bus. As soon as the scene was visible, I knew everything had gone wrong. There was Mattie, my Mattie, sprawled on the ground. He was a bloody mess; the dark red liquid soaking up his dark dark hair. I ran over and tried picking him up. Crying and wiping the blood off his face, I yelled for him to wake up.
He did wake up. And he walked over to the sidewalk and laid there, gurgling that he was fine. Bullshit. He said that he smoked weed with them store people then they put him in a cart or something and that caused him to crash. Those fuckers. I called 911 for an ambulance, but the woman on the line (who talked and sounded just like those ladies who pick up for cab lines) was a fucking cunt. Basically, I was on the line asking for an ambulance and explaining what and where the event had happened, and she wasn't even paying attention. Then Mattie spotted an ambulance around half a block away. My stomach lurched.

I tried to cover the scene from his sight. The more I tried, the more he struggled to see.
"Who's there? Is that Suze? My Susie?" He kept gurgling, yelling, and trying to get up. His outreached, bloody fingers were full of love for Susan. He needed to be there and touch her and die with her if need be!!!! However, I wouldn't let him. I wouldn't let him die!!!! No, he can't. He needs to work for me a little longer. He needs to come back with me. And OBVIOUSLY the other hurt one is Susan; who else!? I didn't know what to do except to make sure Matt stays down until the next ambulance comes, but my tears betrayed everything. I couldn't stop crying.

I couldn't even stop Susan from going down the street.
I couldn't be there for Matt when the others were toying him around. Dicks.
I couldn't get an ambulance to come.
And I'm half a block away, watching a distorted scene of paramedics working on Susan's limp body on the ground through layers of tears.

Then all the sound was gone and the whole thing was in slow-mo (this is when I consciously, in my dream, affirm to myself to write this dream down and to make it into a short movie...).

Matt, a bloody mess, screaming and prying himself out from my arms to flop over on the ground while trying to get up.
Susan, a fuzzy bloody mess, getting hoisted on to a stretcher.
Paramedics, the tired blobs, pulling the white sheet over Susan's face.

All I hear is a fuzzy noise and as if on cue, I WAKE UP! YAAAYYYY!!!!

Kelowna BC - part I

I went on a 2 night 3 day weekend getaway let's relax sort of a road trip the other weekend. Instead, I came back thoroughly (this means mentally AND physically) wiped out. I don't think I'm cut out for that many activities during a road trip. I don't think it should be allowed for a person to do that many activities in such a time frame when it is almost 40 degrees celsius outside. I really don't think so.

But the trip was funemployment at its best.

Pressure's truly on. What is my manisfesto of the moment? What can I manifest?


FRIDAY- Kelowna downtown public beach

The Vibrant Vine was a small local winery with 3D arts, live music, and a little food truck diner. The vibe was great, the yard and the people there were extremely cozy. Their wine, on the other hand, definitely makes the worst-wines-I've-ever-drank list.

This vineyard, these sun rays, your tipsy happiness... they are all mine. Muahahhahahahahaha. Gray Monk Winery for the ones with time. 

Additionally, thank you to everyone who made it out last night to the mixer, Waddle Waffle!!! Thank you thank you thank you. Love y'all!!!!

Tweet @rachelchungg

Tumble @iampurpose

$$$$ Kendrick Lamar $$$$

THE SPITEFUL CHANT by KENDRICK LAMAR ft. SCHOOLBOY Q

SWIMMING POOL (DRANK) by KENDRICK LAMAR

Been fadin' for too many nights in a row.

Recovery day today.

Started at Tim Hortons for a bagel with cream cheese

Hopped to Starbucks to flash my poor gold card for ma grande dark

Too lazy to shower

Hop to Jericho

Beach and tan and just living the Vancity life-

Moving again soon.

Wish me luck. 

Pray for only the Lord will help poor souls out from abyss.

@rachelchungg